To have a strong relationship, you need to trust, respect, and support each other. Some partners, though, may try to control the other, which can cause stress and an imbalance. This behavior, which can be caused by insecurities, power dynamics, or mental health problems, can show up in a lot of different ways, from subtle manipulation to complete dominance. An online community member recently asked Reddit users for help with her husband’s unreasonable demand.
This is what she wrote:
“My husband has never done anything so strange before.” Without a doubt, he is a wonderful husband, and I love him very much. My husband has never been very normal. He is very smart and works as a computer programmer, but he also has a lot of strange beliefs. Both real and made up.
He has been worried a lot lately about the environment and climate change. He began to worry a lot about water about two months ago. Sure, water. He worries about how clean the water is. He changed the filters in our house, and I love it because the water tastes so much better.
He does worry about how much water we use, though. Not because of the money, but because of the Earth. We can only take two showers a week now that he made it a rule. I like to take a shower every night before bed. “I don’t like being dirty in bed.”
What else did she say?
“This is the reason for the most fights in our 20-year marriage.” He became crazy about how much water we use. But he would turn off the hot water while I was in the shower. At first, I didn’t care about his rule. For some reason, going to the gym every night is too much work for me now that I have kids. I really believed that he would get better in a month. But he still can’t get past this.
I had to skip taking a shower last night because I had “hit my quota,” as he says. I told him not to do anything because I was taking a shower. But after about two minutes, he turned off the hot water. I went down, grabbed my towel, and began yelling. There’s nothing smarter he’s ever done than telling him this. I also told him I would move in with my parents if he didn’t stop.
Guys, I love this man so much that I feel trapped. I love him very much, but I can’t take this any longer. Is my threat to move out going too far?”
