Bringing a child to life is a unique experience that most new moms want to capture for themselves and their husbands. However things might not turn out how we all wish, and because of that our new mom reached Bright Side for help. Her husband is forcing her to do the most unimaginable thing and allows his parents in the delivery room.
Here is her letter she sent us:
Thanks for reaching out, Jasmin. We appreciate your trust and openness. We’re happy to offer you some advice on handling this situation.
Try to compromise, a video call is a good option
Instead of flatly saying no and getting into an argument with your husband, try to find compromise that makes the situation easier for both of you. One option could be to involve his parents through a video call during a less intimate part of the labor. By offering this alternative, they can feel included in the experience and share in the joy of the moment without being physically present in the delivery room. This way, you show that you value their involvement while still preserving the intimate experience you envisioned for yourself and your husband.
Check the hospital rules
A lot of hospital’s policies have rules regarding who is allowed in the delivery room. Sometimes, hospital policies can provide a neutral solution by setting limits on the number of people allowed. Use hospital policies to set limits on the number of people allowed in the delivery room, which might naturally limit the presence of his parents. Check if your hospital has similar policies to help manage this situation.
Return to home and talk
There isn’t a problem that can’t be solved with good communication. The first step to solving it is coming back home with a clear head and calmly discussing the situation with your husband because avoidance won’t make it any better. Leaving the house might escalate the issue, so a calm and composed discussion is essential. You should remind your husband that you are a team, and this experience is significant for your relationship and your future child.
Celebrate after giving birth
Consider inviting your in-laws right after the birth. His parents can be the first to visit the newborn. This way, they can still be a part of the special moment without being present during the actual delivery. You and your husband would have your private time while also including his parents in the celebration shortly after. It ensures everyone feels involved and valued without compromising on the intimate experience that you desires during labor.
Let the parents be present in the early stages
Another option is to allow his parents to be there during the early part of labor, but ask them to leave when it’s time for the actual delivery. This way, they can support their son, and you can have the private moment you want. Aside from keeping the moment for yourself, having privacy in the delivery room is crucial to support the release of the hormones necessary for your labor and birth. You could plan specific times for them to come in to offer their support and then step out during the critical moments.
Children bring joy and happiness to marriages, and the pregnancy process feels long as you anticipate meeting them. While labor is tough for mothers, fathers, and familes can make the delivery fun by joking around and taking pictures. Check how these people captured the funniest delivery room moments.
