Entering a new relationship often brings excitement that easily clouds our judgment, causing us to miss subtle warning signs. These initial red flags may appear minor, but they can signal deeper issues that could lead to problems later on. Recognize these early indicators, and we can avoid emotional pain and unhealthy dynamics.

Here are some real stories from individuals sharing their experiences.

Story 1

I dated a guy once who had an argument over the phone with a family member. After he got off the phone, he picked up a nearby picture frame and just smashed it onto the ground, sending glass everywhere. The argument was something to do with a book. We had been dating for maybe two months. He was 26. That one was a massive red flag. © juicytubes / Reddit

Story 2

He would claim that all his exes had “insecurities” that ruined the relationship. After five months, I realized it was actually his behavior that likely caused those insecurities, and he used it as an excuse to avoid taking any responsibility. © Just-Cup5542 / Reddit

Story 3

He always insisted on tucking me in at night, which I thought was cute — until I noticed how particular he was about the blankets. They had to be perfectly tight, almost like I couldn’t move.

One night, I woke up gasping for air, only to realize he had tied the ends of the sheets to the bedframe while I slept. When I confronted him, he just smiled and said, “I like knowing you’re safe…and that you can’t leave.”

Story 4

I was talking to a guy who expected replies within minutes. If I didn’t respond within 30 minutes, he’d say things like “she’s gone again” or “I’ve lost her interest again.” It became exhausting to keep up. When I told him I didn’t feel comfortable continuing the conversation, he started complaining about how women never give him a chance, insisting that he’s a good man.

He might not have seen it, but his behavior came across as controlling and pressuring. I eventually had to block him because he kept messaging me even after I asked him to stop. Later, he even sent paid likes on a dating platform to try and get my attention. © Unknown author / Reddit

Story 5

He would mostly meet me late in the evening or at night, usually just driving around or at places like McDonald’s and Subway. I thought he was just busy, but it turns out he didn’t want anyone to see us together because he was meeting someone else, who was more attractive, during more “appropriate” hours and locations. After that, I learned to avoid anyone who suggests a first date at 10:30 p.m. to “drive around and hang out.” © german1sta / Reddit

Story 6

I was seeing this guy for a few months, and everything seemed great until one day he casually mentioned that he thought women should always dress up for men. I asked him why, and he shrugged, saying, “If I’m putting in the effort, you should too.” I brushed it off at first, but then I noticed he would comment on what I wore and suggest I change if he didn’t approve. It felt controlling, and I realized I didn’t want to date someone who dictated how I should look.

Story 7

No kidding, my college professor used to be close with this gorgeous girl he met through work. Then, out of the blue, she disappeared, and he never mentioned her again. During a casual conversation, he shared that she had a creepy habit of taking pictures of animal droppings for fun and showing them to her friends, including him. © 1Anto / Reddit

Story 8

Sometimes the drama she had with other people didn’t add up. When I asked, “What exactly did they say?” she would respond in vague generalizations. Once, I pressed her and asked, “What were the exact words?” and she broke down crying because she was so upset.
It turned out she had been inventing the drama all along, even faking phone calls, emails, and text messages. She couldn’t give me the exact words because there were none. © EastSideTilly / Reddit

Story 9

His mother once told me, “He’ll always be my baby, no matter what.” There was a reason for that statement — many reasons, actually. I got out in a few months, though I know it was still too long. The next woman, however, was stuck for years, and it took a lot of outside help for her to finally escape. © Shadowkittee / Reddit

Story 10

I thought it was sweet how he always made breakfast for me. He’d wake up early to prepare my favorite meals and leave little notes beside them. But one morning, I found a note that read, “Eat up, or you’ll regret it.” I laughed it off as a joke, but it happened again the next day with a different note: “You don’t want to see me angry.” I asked him about it, and he shrugged, saying he was just trying to keep me healthy. But that night, I found my phone charger unplugged, and when I looked for my phone, I found it hidden in the kitchen drawer. I confronted him again, and he simply said, “You’ll thank me when you realize how much better your life is without distractions.”