Today, we’re diving into a common yet divisive issue many travelers have encountered: the airplane seat recline debate. At what point does one person’s pursuit of comfort start to intrude on someone else’s personal space?

We recently received a message from a reader named Mark that illustrates this gray area perfectly. His experience highlights fatigue, social expectations, and the often-unspoken etiquette of flying in tight quarters.

As you read his account and our thoughts on it, consider how you might have responded in his shoes—or hers.

Here’s Mark’s letter:

Hello,

I’m a 34-year-old man, and yesterday I flew home from a business trip. It was a six-hour flight on a budget airline where legroom is nearly nonexistent. Because I’m 6’3″, I paid extra to reserve an aisle seat to give myself as much room as possible.

Unfortunately, the flight was delayed two hours, and by the time we boarded, I was beyond exhausted. I had pulled an all-nighter to finalize a presentation for a major client meeting that morning, which, thankfully, had gone well. But by the time I boarded, I was completely spent.

As soon as the seatbelt sign turned off, I leaned my seat back sharply, hoping to get some much-needed rest. I didn’t check behind me first. Almost immediately, the woman seated behind me, whom I later learned was pregnant, cried out, “I can’t breathe!” I was surprised, but honestly just too tired to deal with it.